Mum actually called me after I left a message! I remembered to call her back because she now has out-of-state calling costs. Initially, she said that she was a bit bored. I am glad that she is honest with me, and I would not tell her not to tell me her feelings, but hearing that she is bored brings me so many emotions -- I wish I were there, it's better than an alternative, you could be doing so many things.... Anyway, the recurring "bored" comment, though irritating, is minor.
Mum told me that she was planning to go to mass. This social engagement was going to conflict with the extra care visit. If Mum were home by 6pm, then all would be well. I decided that the burden would be minimal -- Mum would get to mass, the most important thing. She would miss McDonald's, and perhaps a trip to the grocery store, but....
I called Jean and asked if she could get Mum home by 6pm. No problem. Mum seemed to be okay with this arrangement. Adjusting one step at a time, I decided that this was the best resolution for today.
I thanked Mum for cooperating. She replied, "I try."
Mum called me at about 5:20 to tell me she was home, and to ask me what she now shoujld do. I explained, and have not heard back from her.
Certainly, I am too caught up in the details, but I am not sure what to do about that. Another day is done....
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
Mummy Moment
This evening, I went into my room and had a Mummy moment. During the day, I had spread out stuff on my bed. Then, getting caught up doing other things, the stuff sat in various piles. Those piles certainly were not going to be dealt with tonight, and, therefore, the piles were stacked ever so neatly into a container. Mummy's mostly were made of cardboard. Tonight, mine was a laundry basket, as it was handy from having done laundry throughout the day.
I recall so many nights on which the bed had to be cleaned off before slept in. Alas, I now recall a difference. Mummy's bed always was made before the stuff was added -- how could you leave your bed unmade? My bed was unmade today, as often is the case. With that difference, and the fact that my sheets do not get changed on a weekly basis, I breath a sigh of relief before heading to bed.
I recall so many nights on which the bed had to be cleaned off before slept in. Alas, I now recall a difference. Mummy's bed always was made before the stuff was added -- how could you leave your bed unmade? My bed was unmade today, as often is the case. With that difference, and the fact that my sheets do not get changed on a weekly basis, I breath a sigh of relief before heading to bed.
Adjusting
I still have to write about Thanskgiving, which went well. However
today's tribulation involved dinner and the new services. When I
called Mum shortly before 5pm, she was heading down to the dining room
with her neighbor. I reminded her that G was due to come, but that
she probably would be fine. We decided that Mum would leave a note as
to her whereabouts. I wonder how she did. I am trying not to get
caught up in the scheduling details, but....
today's tribulation involved dinner and the new services. When I
called Mum shortly before 5pm, she was heading down to the dining room
with her neighbor. I reminded her that G was due to come, but that
she probably would be fine. We decided that Mum would leave a note as
to her whereabouts. I wonder how she did. I am trying not to get
caught up in the scheduling details, but....
The rest of the evening revolved around dinner at home with my
stepchildren. I still have to finish the dishes, and do more work for
my job. Busy is good?
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Mum murmers
Tonight, I spoke to her! She is fine. She told me all about her bingo partner last night, LVM, including how much Mum thinks that LVM is like her dad.
Mum said that Gloria came tonight. Mum didn't recall the time. Mum didn't have too much to say about it, except that Gloria fixed dinner. I forgot to ask what she fixed. Mum thinks that Gloria doesn't need to fix dinner. I told her that dinner was not one of the stated duties. I tried to explain that Mum is going to have to tell me what she likes and doesn't like about this additional help/care, or whatever it might be called. I am not sure that Mum will be able to do that, but.... Perhaps ideas will come on how to make this work most beneficially.
Mum said that Gloria didn't come last night because it was bingo night. Mum told Gloria not to come. I don't think that I like this, but.... I will have to see if Gloria bills for last night. The schedule should work such that Gloria comes before Mum walks down the hall to bingo.
Mum recalled that Davey came to check out the telephone. Of all the things I thought we would have to deal with, the telephone was not one of them. Oh well, more evidence of the expression -- life happens when you're making other plans.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving! We shall see what it brings....
Mum said that Gloria came tonight. Mum didn't recall the time. Mum didn't have too much to say about it, except that Gloria fixed dinner. I forgot to ask what she fixed. Mum thinks that Gloria doesn't need to fix dinner. I told her that dinner was not one of the stated duties. I tried to explain that Mum is going to have to tell me what she likes and doesn't like about this additional help/care, or whatever it might be called. I am not sure that Mum will be able to do that, but.... Perhaps ideas will come on how to make this work most beneficially.
Mum said that Gloria didn't come last night because it was bingo night. Mum told Gloria not to come. I don't think that I like this, but.... I will have to see if Gloria bills for last night. The schedule should work such that Gloria comes before Mum walks down the hall to bingo.
Mum recalled that Davey came to check out the telephone. Of all the things I thought we would have to deal with, the telephone was not one of them. Oh well, more evidence of the expression -- life happens when you're making other plans.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving! We shall see what it brings....
Added care
The nightly check/care began Monday. I haven't yet gotten an update.
No news is good news?
No news is good news?
Trying to talk
yesterday, I called Mum about 4 times from late afternoon until mid evening. The answering machine came on and then the line was busy. After remembering that bingo was last night's event, I was going to try again after 9pm. However, then I got caught up in my chores and work. I will try to talk again today.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Check list management
TV - messed up again
Telephone - appears to be in working order
Refrigerator - stocked well enough for a few more days
Paper work - somewhat in order
I'm sure that I missed something, but....
Off now to walk the dog.
Telephone - appears to be in working order
Refrigerator - stocked well enough for a few more days
Paper work - somewhat in order
I'm sure that I missed something, but....
Off now to walk the dog.
The ultimate sandwich
Today I had a sandwich with all the fixin's, and none of the calories because it was generational. After putting my 6 year-old on the bus, I headed out for errands with my 90 year-old. I decided to let her go to Mass because doing so would ease my guilt in the event that she does not get to Mass this weekend.
Getting Mum's eyeglasses at Dedham Medical was so simple! She will use her current frames (which are from Dedham Medical), and they will call me when the new lenses are ready. Of course, I asked them to call me rather than Mum because she may forget to tell me. Managing often includes doing what's easiest at the moment.
From there, we proceeded to South Shore Plaza for undergarment shopping at Macy's. This part of the adventure reminded me of how much I do not enjoy shopping. I was completely overwhelmed by the excessive amounts of merchandise, and couldn't get out of there fast enough. However, after a deep breath, I settled into the task of selecting styles, colors, and sizes. With a varied selection, we were off to the dressing room, where I hadn't spent so much time in years. Finally, we ended up with a sufficient stash.
After Macy's, there was no way I was going to go anywhere else in the mall. Instead, we went to Uno's, which is in a separate building, for a quiet and filling lunch. We shared a salad, after which Mum had a lobster slider and I had my favorite -- spinoccoli (sp?) pizza.
I only dropped my 90 year-old off after lunch because I had to get back for the rest of my sandwich. I promised my 6 year-old that he could have a play date so I picked him and his friend up at school. The next few hours included entertaining 2 children, getting a flu shot, checking email, providing snacks, tracing hands for turkey drawings, dropping off 1 child, preparing dinner, and getting my 6 year-old off to soccer practice with his Dad. Another deep breath, and here I am.
This day was successful and exhausting. I did so much and nothing. At times, I questioned whether days like this would be better than my job. While I do not have an answer, it's just as well. For so many reasons, I do not have a choice. I will continue to be an employee, mother, daughter, wife, and wiped out woman.
I conclude this day feeling that sandwiches are a good diet for at least a bit longer.
Getting Mum's eyeglasses at Dedham Medical was so simple! She will use her current frames (which are from Dedham Medical), and they will call me when the new lenses are ready. Of course, I asked them to call me rather than Mum because she may forget to tell me. Managing often includes doing what's easiest at the moment.
From there, we proceeded to South Shore Plaza for undergarment shopping at Macy's. This part of the adventure reminded me of how much I do not enjoy shopping. I was completely overwhelmed by the excessive amounts of merchandise, and couldn't get out of there fast enough. However, after a deep breath, I settled into the task of selecting styles, colors, and sizes. With a varied selection, we were off to the dressing room, where I hadn't spent so much time in years. Finally, we ended up with a sufficient stash.
After Macy's, there was no way I was going to go anywhere else in the mall. Instead, we went to Uno's, which is in a separate building, for a quiet and filling lunch. We shared a salad, after which Mum had a lobster slider and I had my favorite -- spinoccoli (sp?) pizza.
I only dropped my 90 year-old off after lunch because I had to get back for the rest of my sandwich. I promised my 6 year-old that he could have a play date so I picked him and his friend up at school. The next few hours included entertaining 2 children, getting a flu shot, checking email, providing snacks, tracing hands for turkey drawings, dropping off 1 child, preparing dinner, and getting my 6 year-old off to soccer practice with his Dad. Another deep breath, and here I am.
This day was successful and exhausting. I did so much and nothing. At times, I questioned whether days like this would be better than my job. While I do not have an answer, it's just as well. For so many reasons, I do not have a choice. I will continue to be an employee, mother, daughter, wife, and wiped out woman.
I conclude this day feeling that sandwiches are a good diet for at least a bit longer.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Communication frustration
Three times I called Mum tonight about tomorrow's plans. Once I left a message. I did not hear back from her. Was she out? Was she on the telephone? Was it off the hook? Frustrated, I will try to get other things done now.
Awaiting the next adventure
Tomorrow, I am planning to take Mum to get new eye glasses and personal items. This promises to be an adventure for sure. I am ready for it. With any luck, we will have fun and get things done. My schedule is somewhat flexible, but I do have to be home to get Connor off the bus.
Who would have thought that my coveted days off from my job would be spent like this? Not me, but life is full of surprises because I actually am looking forward to it. I am only hoping that I can fit in some exercise time. Fortunately, it won't be too difficult because I managed to fit in a slow but energizing 5 mile run today.
Who would have thought that my coveted days off from my job would be spent like this? Not me, but life is full of surprises because I actually am looking forward to it. I am only hoping that I can fit in some exercise time. Fortunately, it won't be too difficult because I managed to fit in a slow but energizing 5 mile run today.
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Simply Start
This blog is to share my attempt at Managing to Make it. An end to this tite was contemplated for too long. Would it be making it with Mummy, or in spite of her?
I am hoping that others will share their thoughts, feelings, frustrations, ideas, and what have you during this process.
At the heart of this management is my ninety-year-old mother, MumMorgan. I am the youngest of her 8 children, all or whom choose to be part of MumMorgan's life, as well as each other's lives, though it is not easy.
I am hoping that others will share their thoughts, feelings, frustrations, ideas, and what have you during this process.
At the heart of this management is my ninety-year-old mother, MumMorgan. I am the youngest of her 8 children, all or whom choose to be part of MumMorgan's life, as well as each other's lives, though it is not easy.
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